Two-Bit Fucknugget Thinks He's Three-Bit FuckNugget

Oh no you don't you cockless shitstain:

Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez may sign a contract for four Russian diesel submarines on a visit to Moscow next month, the Kommersant daily has reported, citing unidentified officials.

Chavez has been invited to the May inauguration of Dmitry Medvedev as Russian president.

If he takes up the invitation, the Venezuelan leader may use the opportunity to sign a contract to buy four Kilo-class diesel submarines agreed to at the start of this year, the paper said.

Kommersant said the submarine contract, worth about $1 billion ($1.27 billion), had been set to be signed in February.

Venezuela is seeking a loan of about $800 million ($1.02 billion) from a Russian bank, probably from Russia's official debt agent, Vneshekonombank, for some of the arms purchases, the paper said, adding that the loan had yet to be agreed.

Officials at Venezuela's Moscow embassy were not immediately available for comment on the report. A spokesman for Russia's state arms exporter could not be reached for comment and the foreign ministry declined to comment.

The paper said Venezuela also wants to buy 12 Ilyushin Il-76 military transport aircraft while Russia is interested in selling Caracas its new generation Sukhoi Su-35 fighters, which are still being tested.

Two things you little cocksucker.

One, it is about fucking time you realized there's only room for one enormous set of balls in this hemisphere so if you'd like your little raisins to see the sun you may want to relocate your socialist shithole somewhere more amenable like the Korean peninsula.

Second, I hope you and your slaves citizens enjoy spending all that grocery money on high tech death toys only to get froggy one day and have the Righteous Yankee Fist of Doom come a-fuckin' on through. You'll be sitting there explaining how submarines are supposed to be underwater to people who live in the reality that they are filled with water. I'd say you'd feel stupid but if being an unapologetic commie doesn't get you there, I'm pretty sure being on the receiving end of the most one-sided war since the Wehrmacht kicked a puppy wont' do it either.

Next time you come to visit the United Nations we catapult your commie ass into the side of the building at close range.

Hell, we should sell tickets.


Ya, esta adentro, papi?

Call It Burma

I know you think you're being culturally sensitive when you refer to that country as Myanmar but you're actually being a fucking twat.

Listen, it was always called Burma. Then this brutal dictatorship put its boot heel on the neck of the Burmese people and changed the name to Myanmar but to the people it has always been Burma. They'd tell you if they hadn't been ventilated by shock troops.

It's like a guy calls a girl Sally while he rapes her and when the cops get there, they call her Sally out of respect.

So, you're kinda being a dick.

Burma.

Got it?

Update: Exactly.